Rant of the Day

Don't leave your teenage child unsupervised on my porch. I don't know who you are, but it sure as hell doesn't make me feel comfortable having some teenager staring at me while I take Madison out to piss. Shouldn't he be in school anyway?

When I say "excuse me", it's a polite way of me saying "get the fuck out of my way, please."

Please don't leave your JPEG files all over my desktop.

Please don't keep asking me where the extention cord is when I point to it and give you the universal sign of "one minute!"

When I accidentally interrupt you don't yell at me. When you accidentally interrupt me, I don't get snippy with you (usually).

Please move your bed from being against the wall when you're banging the hell out of your girlfriend for an hour. Some people like to sleep at 3:00 am, ya know!

Please quit throwing your cigarette butts in the yard and pick up your friends'. It's gross. Put an empty coffee can outside your door. I don't like being blamed for your dirtiness. I'm a clean smoker. I don't even throw them out of the car window, usually.

Madison, please quit eating the cat poop out of the litter box.

PMS, please go away.